Positive Vibes

So, I've been feeling pretty good lately, despite my bouts of insomnia. I think after writing my last post, although I still have recurring dreams about resolving my friendship (two since then). I've learned to relax about them though. I really do feel happy praying about that individual. I think one thing I constantly told him was that I always wanted him to be happy.

So, I've been painting my room here, and rearranging a few things. It's nice to change things around...makes the atmosphere seem brand new. A new development - my resolve to remain positive about my situations. So far, it's been working out great. I even visited a new church. I didn't meet anyone new, but I like the church - it's mixed race, and the pastor is really cool. Definitely a different thing for this area. I'm sure I'll meet some folks soon.

I do have quite a few friends here, they're actually really nice. I spent some time hanging out last night having a screwdriver with a good buddy here, and just chatting. I miss those kinds of times. I definitely miss it with my nerd crew in Kansas City. I really love those guys...I mean really, I think last year I met a ton of wonderful people at the right time. It's hard to not want to come back, but I'm doing what needs to be done at the moment to ensure a successful career.

Christmas was bittersweet. I think everyone I know felt the pangs of the way the economy this year and so gift giving was limited. Personally, I don't care much for the holidays, but for the sake of my mom and sister I participate. Some strange happenings though, I had that recurring dream again about my old friend Adam, and then I had a friend who I had stayed with when I came to Kansas City briefly tell me he didn't want to be friends anymore. He grossly misinterpreted our conversation for some reason, and overreacted - I mean grossly overreacted. He called my best friend and told him something totally off the wall, and I mean I couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of it. But I went ahead and wrote a friendly letter to clear things up, guess that wasn't good enough. He may be choosing to not talk to me out of stubborness- who knows. What I do know is that where I once was concerned about resolving the issue, I no longer care - because I'm not in the wrong. I'm not saying that callously, I'm saying that because from all the saved conversations and emails and having other folks read them to make sure that I didnt' say something utterly offensive...it's a fact that I'm not in the wrong.

As of late, I've had two different types of people in my life. The ones that contact me and really wonder how I'm doing, and the ones who won't talk to me unless I talk to them first...and I mean this is for EVERY conversation. I don't understand people like this. There's one person in particular I can think of that I think gets off from trying to belittle me every conversation we have. I think maybe they're compensating for lack of a penis or something I don't know. But it's retarded...and I really just get sick of putting up with stuff like that - and I don't have to.

Things have been on the up and up..and I'm grateful for that. It gets exasperating sometimes being here, but things take time to come together, and I do have my sights set on a certain goal before the middle of 2010.

I have a great feeling that good things are going to happen in a lot of areas in my life. I'm definitely ready for it.